The Love of My Life, by Anthony Varrecchia

Saturday, January 29th, 2011

I NEEDED to be part of the NOH8 Campaign as it is VERY personal for me.

Staten Island is where I grew up. I was bullied, ridiculed, humiliated and pushed around throughout my school years. As I got older, it did get better. It wasn't until I was in my mid 30's that I finally accepted the proud gay man that I am. The whole world opened up..and so did I.

My photo arrived! I cried and got VERY emotional. You see, the photo I am holding in my hand is of my late husband who passed away in the summer of 2008. This photo represents love with his name in Hebrew over my heart. I wanted to make a statement while holding the photo of him. It was my way of including him in the NOH8 Campaign.

He and I met in 2000, a year later we registered domestic partners and exchanged rings on a plane ride to San Francisco. In the summer of '02 we went to Vermont for a civil union, a few weeks later we planned a wedding in New Paltz, NY and had a beautiful one requesting that all the guests wear white to the Pet Shop Boys song "Being Boring". In the winter of '07 we went to MA to get a married but at the time it was not legal. We were turned away and were devastated. Unfortunately, they never told us that at the time you needed to be a resident of the state. Laws have changed since. In the summer of '08 on July 5th (the anniversary of the Vermont civil union), we got married with the legal document of the law. We did it. We felt that we got married so many times. Our's was a journey of equality, passion and love.

My husband passed away a few weeks later in an accident.

He was not only my husband, he was my first boyfriend, first love, my teacher, my best friend, my soul mate.

All my best and thank you,

Anthony Varrecchia
W Hoboken Open Shoot


Wow I wish could find a guy like you did :3

Jojo 02/05/2011 18:11

Your story has inspired me and now I definitely have to show my support. Four years ago, I met my first girlfriend, my first love, my teacher, my best friend, and my soul mate too.
If by cruel fate I had to lose her, I'd at least want to die trying to have her every which way first.

Stay strong, Anthony. My fight will be for you too.

Maria G 04/03/2011 19:22

Wow your story is very touching and you sound like a strong person.

Tia Tanika Stone 05/18/2011 17:04

Tq you for sharing your story, i cried after read it and very proud of wht you did.

i also hope tht 1 day i can find a guy like you did.

all the best to you.

冰の 王 06/15/2011 06:03

Your story is so inspiring. I was just sharing this with my partner of 10yrs. and could not get through your story without weaping and crying. You are so strong and all the best to you. Thanks for sharing your beautiful story.xoxo Sam L. 1/10/12

Sam 01/10/2012 19:09

I'm sitting on the sofa with my husband of two years and have tears running down my cheeks. I almost lost him in November to a climbing accident, and can only imagine what you went through. I admire your strength and resilience. I hope that love finds you again!

Mark Linenberg 03/19/2012 20:18

Thank you all for your amazing comments. They put me to tears. I wish you all Love.


Anthony Varrecchia 04/20/2012 12:54

Anthony, I believe I went to grammar school with you on SI (concord)and I remember quite well you getting bullied and chased down the street, and lets not forget the evil third grade teacher, Mrs Schecter. I never personally 'popped you in your face' (if you remember that) and I hated seeing you bullied. You were always sweet (and funny) to me and I secretly thought you were the handsomest boy in the school. I'm so sorry for your loss, I hope one day you will find happiness again. I always wondered what happened to the beautiful boy with the great sense of humor, now I know, and oh my, what a beautiful man you are. Be strong, be proud, no one can ever hurt you again...Fran

frannie 02/28/2013 17:07

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